What We All Learned This Morning

This morning was a morning of learning. Some people have mornings of learning where they read something in a book or see something they didn't know before in the paper or on TV. Sometimes, people even go to school in the morning, and learn that way. Our morning of learning didn't have any of those things.

Thursdays are the day when The Doctor gets up at the obscene hour of "still dark outside o'clock", and in his obscenely cheerful way, bakes muffins, brews coffee, and takes a walk. This is pretty much the sort of obscenely annoying thing he does nearly every day, but Thursdays are the day when he also gets a ride in to work early for meetings. Leaving the rest of us behind. Sleeping. Because normal people aren't up yet.

The learning part actually happens pretty much every Thursday. Stuff like I learn that he forgot to reset the alarm; or that Tater Tot decided to perform an impromptu science experiment in the bathroom and now I need to find the wet vac; or that Doodle Bug had a ten page report with diagrams due this morning; or that the dog magically opened the door to a bedroom all by himself, and helped himself to stuffy that he then dismembered in an I am dog, hear me roar moment.

(To be honest, Tater does experiments most mornings, so I guess that one's not such a big deal, and Doodle's report was actually not for class. It was a self-assigned report with flow charts and diagrams, outlining the way that the playground worm population could best utilize the new structures he and his pals had built. It's called Wormy Island, and apparently, it's a pretty posh new housing development for discerning worms and potato bugs. He wrote it all up on the way to school that morning, and some of the units are now move-in ready.)

Anyway, this Thursday morning was a little different. The Doctor did his usual deal. Then he left. And then, the boys woke up. And instead of their usual deal (making enough noise to drown out a herd of elephants at a disco party), they quietly "borrowed" my phone. The phone with my wake-up alarm.

The official story is that they wanted to let me get a little more sleep, being the thoughtful, considerate children that they are. And I did. A lot more sleep. I woke up a few hours later, feeling well rested and serene, Tater Tot curled up on one side of me and the dog at my feet. That lovely serenity lasted the three seconds it took me to roll over and look at the clock.


So, here is what I learned today:

1. I am a sound sleeper.
2. I need multiple alarms in the morning.
3. I need to hide some of these alarms so that my clever (i.e. devious) offspring will not find them all.
4. My children are sweet, kind, and thoughtful. Especially, if it's in their own self-interest to be so.
5. It's possible to be proud and annoyed at the same time. (Proud that the guys were working together toward something, and annoyed that the something was snookering me.)
   

Here is what the boys learned today:

1. Mom is a sound sleeper.
2. If you can find and neutralize mom's alarms, you can have a leisurely morning, doing whatever you want.
3. Being sweet, kind, and thoughtful can get you whatever you want. Especially if mom is asleep when you're being sweet, kind, and/or thoughtful.
4. Saltines, Nutella, and mini M&Ms are a great breffy combination.
5. While we lost the chance to win the Perfect Attendance award on the first day of school, we do stand a really great shot at winning the Most Tardies award.
6. An award for Most Tardies is still an award.
7. Making videos and taking photos is fun.
8. Leaving videos and photos on mom's phone is leaving evidence.